StandUpComedyPortal.com For each and everyone who loves stand-up comedy. Follow @StandUpPortal !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs"); Tumblr (3.0; @standupportal)http://standupportal.tumblr.com/<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/f545d441deb2c424eb3db61d11f8dcd7/tumblr_mhh2dcFu441ruyb13o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004VPTZGA/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B004VPTZGA&linkCode=as2&tag=standupcome03-20" title="American The Bill Hicks Story">American The Bill Hicks Story</a></p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/41922660771http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/41922660771Wed, 30 Jan 2013 23:16:20 -0500American The Bill Hicks StoryBill HicksBill Hicks videostand-up comedystand up comedystand-up comediancomedycomediancomediansstand-up comedianshistory<iframe width="400" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/oWX8SfSgCl0?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>Bill Maher - Comic Relief, 1994</p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40352641855http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40352641855Sat, 12 Jan 2013 13:36:53 -0500bill MaherComic Reliefstand-up comedycomedystand-upcomediancomic“You can only offend me if you mean something to me.”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Chris-Rock">Chris Rock</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40352455245http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40352455245Sat, 12 Jan 2013 13:34:25 -0500Chris Rockquotesquotecomedy quotestand-up comedy quotesfunnyjokejokescomedy jokes<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/275f7c789a581fd764952192f971d641/tumblr_mgizj6sOpi1ruyb13o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Chris-Rock">Chris Rock</a></p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40352355065http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40352355065Sat, 12 Jan 2013 13:33:06 -0500Chris Rockcomediancomicstand-up comedycomedystand-up comedian<a href="http://www.keithandthegirl.com/marathon/">The Keith and The Girl 54-Hour Live Comedy Broadcast!</a>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40100396811http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/40100396811Wed, 09 Jan 2013 11:51:53 -0500comedystand-up comedycomediansstand-uplive“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Billy-Crystal">Billy Crystal</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39953999152http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39953999152Mon, 07 Jan 2013 16:35:24 -0500Billy CrystalquotequotesBilly Crystal quotesstand-up comedycomedy quotesfunnyjoke<iframe width="400" height="299" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/gDW_Hj2K0wo?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>Bill Hicks on marketing, from “Relentless”.</p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39953806724http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39953806724Mon, 07 Jan 2013 16:33:09 -0500Bill Hicksmarketingstand-up comedycomedycomediansstand-up comedians<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/f5fb810252ed75196f689d72d0726188/tumblr_mg9ydsDG1n1ruyb13o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Richard-Pryor">Richard Pryor</a></p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39953523811http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39953523811Mon, 07 Jan 2013 16:29:52 -0500Richard Pryorcomediancomicstand-up comedy“You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Bob-Hope">Bob Hope</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39831174158http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39831174158Sun, 06 Jan 2013 07:01:44 -0500Bob HopequoteBob Hope quotesstand-up comedy quotescomediancomedy<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/e73bf3e5072e06771f2c1f20cc6d6471/tumblr_mg7dca6FeO1ruyb13o1_400.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Bob Newhart</p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39831117145http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39831117145Sun, 06 Jan 2013 07:00:10 -0500Bob Newhartcomiccomedianstand-up comedian<iframe width="400" height="299" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/u_n5JWzj6yU?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>Eddie Murphy - The Cookout</p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39831049448http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39831049448Sun, 06 Jan 2013 06:58:01 -0500eddie murphycomedycomedianstand-up comedycomics“I would like to give these kids a good home. In fact, there’s one a few miles away from here…”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Bernie-Mac">Bernie Mac</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39723513800http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39723513800Sat, 05 Jan 2013 00:45:22 -0500Bernie MacBernie Mac quotes<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/356623432645d9bad433370bcb1b161e/tumblr_mg518dT2v61ruyb13o1_400.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Andy Kaufman</p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39723370813http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39723370813Sat, 05 Jan 2013 00:43:25 -0500Andy Kaufmancomediancomicstand-up comediancomedians<iframe width="400" height="299" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Tt33zqib2qk?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>Bill Cosby - Grandparents</p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39723102352http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39723102352Sat, 05 Jan 2013 00:39:51 -0500bill cosbyGrandparentscomedycomiccomedianstand-up comedystand-upstand-up comedian“A lot of people say that it’s a lack of vocabulary that makes you swear. Rubbish. I know thousands of words but I still prefer “fuck”.”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Billy-Connolly">Billy Connolly</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39654477917http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39654477917Fri, 04 Jan 2013 08:34:59 -0500Billy Connollyquotequotesfunnyjokejokeslolcomedystand-upstand-up comedy jokes<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/cd34d816543bc0ca621a22477d84409a/tumblr_mg3s98tdjy1ruyb13o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><span class="field-content">Janeane Garofalo</span></p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39654368723http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39654368723Fri, 04 Jan 2013 08:31:56 -0500Janeane Garofalostand-up comedystand-up comediansstand-up comicscomedianscomics<iframe width="400" height="299" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/QZ8hefESt7c?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p><span id="tokens"><span class="tag">George Carlin - God loves you! </span></span></p>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39654107795http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39654107795Fri, 04 Jan 2013 08:24:55 -0500George CarlinGodcomedystand-up comedyjokesfunnycomediansvideowatch“The best definition of an honest politician is one who… when he is bought, stays bought.”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Alan-King">Alan King</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39630386305http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39630386305Thu, 03 Jan 2013 23:42:10 -0500Alan Kingquotescomediancomedyfunnyjokelolstand-up comedycomic“I’m not a person who I ever thought would do well with divorce. Not that it can’t happen. I just didn’t want that. So I waited a long time to meet the right person. Then I finally met someone that I was willing to be divorced from.”<br/><br/> - <em><a href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/quotes/Albert-Brooks">Albert Brooks</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39630225175http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39630225175Thu, 03 Jan 2013 23:40:05 -0500Albert Brooksquotequotescomediancomicstand-up comedyfunnyloljoke“I got so good at writing to a budget, my brain was restricting myself. I’d write, “It’s a stormy night.” Then I’d cross out stormy. I’d write: “It’s a calm night.” Then I’d cross out night. It’s noon. Because you know how much night costs. You know how much rain costs. Nothing comes free in movies.”<br/><br/> - <em><a class="quote-author" href="http://standupcomedyportal.com/comedians/Albert-Brooks">Albert Brooks</a></em>http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39629528407http://standupportal.tumblr.com/post/39629528407Thu, 03 Jan 2013 23:31:09 -0500Albert Brooksmoviesquotefunnylolso truecomedycomedianstand-up comedy